“It’s going to be the best day of your lives.” How many times have people said that in the months leading up to your marriage? How often do you hear yourself say you want it to be “a perfect day?” How much pressure do you feel to create something to impress others and live up to that “ dream day” ideal?
I wonder how many couples stop and really think about how much pressure that is? – to actually pull off the PERFECT day? How important it makes every single decision you take about the wedding day, from what you wear to the décor from the napkins to the transport…How much stress that leads to as minor hiccups occur in the run up to the big day, and ultimately how often it has the potential to spoil a couples enjoyment of the day because they are so worried things must run exactly to plan?
To tell yourself your day HAS to be perfect, you are putting enormous pressure on yourselves and expecting something that ultimately probably won’t happen. To expect a wedding day to pass without a minor issue or two is unrealistic. There will be the odd thing, which isn’t exactly as you planned or hoped, but the chances are you’ll never even notice.
I know that’s hard to believe, but so many couples tell me they had no idea about any problems until long after their big day. Yet if someone had told them these things would go wrong or there would be a small issue with something, they’d have been so upset in the weeks before the wedding. There’s that pressure again.
Of course your wedding day is very, very special indeed. And you will inevitably want it to go smoothly, you’ve been planning it for months, you have everyone there you care about and it IS a big deal, but it doesn’t absolutely have to be perfect. Once you can say that to yourselves, and free yourselves of that terrible pressure and anxiety you’ll discover it’s far easier to stay calm and less stressed.
I also feel it’s so sad to suggest your wedding day will be THE best day of your life. Why? Because if that’s true, then what does that say about the rest of your lives together? The adventures, the achievements, the goals you will reach as a couple. Can you never have another day to equal your wedding day? I can honestly say my wedding day was wonderful.
I loved it from the moment I woke to the moment we waved goodbye to guests at the venue. It was fabulous. But it wasn’t the ONLY amazing day in my life. Since then I’ve gone on to have a child, and that really was one of the most incredible experiences of my life. My wedding is still up there, but I wished I hadn’t put myself under so much pressure, believing it HAD to be immense. Because life is about having many amazing days.
Your wedding day will be ONE of the best days of your life. All your planning and hard work will pay off. I promise. And once it’s over, you have so many other dream days you can plan- and isn’t that a wonderful thought?
To find out more about Cat Hepple, her services and portfolio visit her website www.cathepplephotography.com