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Keeping Your Inner Bridezilla at Bay

Although it was over 5 years ago that I go married, was I a Bridezilla or did I manage to keep my inner Bridezilla in check?  What do you think?  Keep reading to the end of the post and I will let you know.

Basically brides can be categorised into two groups; the first have previously been bridesmaids and maids of honor, thrown bridal showers, and zipped up the backs of plenty of wedding dresses. They’ve encounter the legendary bridezilla in real life and under their breath vowed never to morph into the mythological creature on their own wedding day.

bridezilla

Source: Miss Cake Folksy

The second type of wife-to-be is as excited about being the centre of attention as she is about marrying her fiancé.  Her idea of wedding planning is romanticised, idealistic, and usually involves countless hours from friends, family, and future in-laws to make her dream wedding a reality.

No matter which bride you are, it’s almost inevitable that, at some point or another, you will turn dark. Without careful consideration and a healthy dose of humility, any bride can quickly cross over into bridezilla territory.

Excitement turns to anxiety and that glow of happiness people were talking about melts into stress and scowls. Some brides even use the ‘bridezilla’ term as caveat to all of their unjust behaviour during the wedding planning.  However the best form of defence is to have strategies in place so that the bridal version of Godzilla is kept away.

The most influential thing a bride can to do prevent a case of the bridezillas is to keep focused on the meaning of the day. From the day your engagement is announced until your wedding dress is folded into the departing car, keep things in perspective and focus on the marriage and not the wedding.

You will be excruciatingly busy during the bridal preparations, but try and keep a diary or journal with all the positive experiences as a way of counteracting the small annoyances that antagonise Bridezilla.  Each day, record one wedding-related thing that you are thankful for. It might be something as simple as receiving a RSVP from a favorite school friend or something quite substantial like confirming a venue.

In addition to keeping a positive, a burgeoning bride might also consider appointing a particularly honest loved one to warn her of impending bridezilla status. Before the wedding-planning gets into full swing, have a serious conversation with a trusted friend, potential bridesmaid, or sister and ask her to be your bridal barometer.

bridal baramoter

Source: That70s Shoppe

If you get a little out-of-control, let your bridezilla-slayer know that it is her responsibility to quickly and calmly bring such unladylike behavior to your attention before everyone starts running for the hills. In the heat of the moment, it is easy to lash out and accuse your close friend of being overdramatic with her calm suggestions, but remember that you picked this individual because you trust her judgment and that you should probably bite your tongue. Of course, be sure to thank your trusted, brave soul and accompanying bridesmaids by giving them each a sentimental gift and for your bridal barometer maybe one in advance!

Keep things simple whenever possible in order to sidestep unnecessary drama. Don’t sweat the details; after all, in the grand scheme of life, is it really worth yelling about whether the ink in the invitations matches the colour aisle runner?

One way to keep your sanity is to enlist the help of a professional or to find a venue that includes its own wedding planner who knows the space forwards and backwards.

Another way to avoid a meltdown is to steer clear of unrealistic expectations. Whether it is the idea that you are going to lose 25 pounds in a month or hand make all the centerpieces and wedding favors in a week’s time, don’t set the bar impractically high. Instead, make a commitment to a realistic goal and look objectively at DIY projects that are simple and have no time urgent restrictions, like printing invitations.

Lastly, keep you eye on the prize…your hot soon-to-be hubby!

No matter how stressed you become while planning your nuptial soiree, no matter how annoying your future sister-in law becomes, no matter how many phone calls it takes to figure out if your gown alterations are completed, never let the reason for the ordeal slip your mind.

You’re getting married to the man of your dreams! Sure, you want the big day to be perfect. But, more than anything, you want him to greet you with a look of overwhelming love at the end of that aisle, not relief that your bridezilla status is finally expiring.

Date night isn’t just for married couples, take one night out a week from wedding planning, no wedding chatter allowed and just enjoy each other.

Also remember that it is a big day for both of you, remember to ask for his input and the lasting gift from your wedding planning should not be embarrassing stories about your Bridezilla moments.

So did I keep my Bridezilla moments in check?  For the  most part, but on the actual day itself, when the wedding car broke down and guests pulled out at the last moment, I was as calm as can be.  I concentrated on marrying my best friend.

Happy Planning!

monique trulove --wedding blogger